Please let me know if I can bring a penny fundraiser to your child's school. I promise I won't steal any pennies. I'll simply swap pre-1983 pennies with their equivalent in paper money.
Once I get to $1 million in pennies, I figure I can sell it for $1.75 million to someone who can do whatever they want with them (legally, of course). After all, they'll be worth $2.5 million in melt value.
Sincerely,
Canned Goods
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